Lost In Translation

The votes have been cast, counted and called out. Sometimes decisions are ours to make, sometimes they’re not. Other times you get to make a partial choice as part of a group, voicing your opinion anonymously. In the matter of family decisions, the large life-changing ones for more than one person, the decision made is most often than not based on the members you most care about and not necessarily yourself. Later on in life we may regret these decisions because it was the beginning of the end for ourselves, or we may be proud of the choices that we made, seeing the benefits that have come from them.
Personally, for most of my life I haven’t stood up for what I want, but rather stayed quiet, letting the leader or majority take the role of decision maker. Whether it was because I was too young or lacked the confidence, I don’t regret staying quiet and keeping out of the situation or agreeing with whomever because I see clearly now the outcomes of those situations and the life-changing lessons my whole family has learned from them (whether good or bad). Everything in life happens for a reason. Whether it be our reasoning or God’s, it happens. All we can do is learn from the past, accept the present and look forward to the future with as much childish enthusiasm as possible, praying that God will bring good things our way.
I face a dilemma now, less than 2 weeks away from my birthday, to make a choice. I have ample time to make this decision but it doesn’t make it any easier. As we all know, time flies. I look into the big black unknown abyss in front of me, wondering what every person feels at one stage or other in their life – uncertainty. I have no clue at all what is the right decision and what is the wrong one. Being an over-thinker I take every scenario possible and run it through a million possible outcomes. The problem is that thinking over it doesn’t bring me to the right conclusion like a mathematical equation would, but rather more turmoil and uncertainty than before.
All that I can reassure myself with is that there is no wrong or right choice, merely different ones. Whatever I believe to be right is what I must run with.
The first step now is to identify the choices I can make, then discover which one sounds best.

My brain is empty, yet so full. Somewhere along the line my heart and my head got lost in translation. I wish our lives had a Rosetta Stone.